i'm "giving up" on the handmade jewelry biz. i laughed at myself every time i was referred to as an artist. i will always believe that i am not qualified for art. the only talent i have devoted time to developing is figuring out which foods i ate made my fecal matter its most recent consistency.
i am too old to be "finding my niche" and developing my skill in it. i know my niche and i've neglected it.
and that niche is writing.
so here i am, 5 hours from when my essay on Ophelia is due, straining the definition of "procrastination". and sucking with grammar.
and this is when i got the brilliant plan to devote my days to polishing my writing craft.
maybe it will persuade me to actually get papers done on time.

my life is a puzzle and the pieces i need are all there. here i sit, staring at the tiny fragments, thinking maybe glue would be a suitable tool. or maybe i should eat some fruit to get me started. everything is plainly stated, the table is set and the balloons are tied neatly to the mailbox. my hands would be folded in my lap, but they are constantly clicking though other peoples' travel photos. i don't know where i am. is this where i'm supposed to do some yoga and center myself? i think i'll take a bath.

i like to take literary references and make them vulgar/insipid.

maybe not the best example, but...
"Full of sound and flatus"
i sooooo love that phrase at this moment.

The smiling publix bag boy is most assuredly a minor. And now I feel like a pedo-bear!

TEH END


btw, LJ, I'm cheating on you with blogspt. so sorry.

*shrug*

If I were to post a missed connection right now, it would seek to tell the smiling grocery cashier that his perpetual cheer makes me a little less misanthropic every time I shop for Veggies. It would tell him that I'm sorry for grimacing and frowning so much, because my doom clouds must encroach on his sunniness somehow.
I intend however to tell him in person someday how lovely his smile makes this often drudging task. 
That's why I don't intend to post it for the Anons of craigslist to see.

I'm on a mission. To smile at more people. Which means I'm going to have to chew gum after snacking so that I don't horrify people with my cashew gunk. Mmmm cashews.

Dumpster Diving is my new shopping. I  am very happy with this change.
I've been selling jewelry out of a small shop and out on the street.
Planning on shows to book at a warehouse.
Generally feeling really good.

It seems as if I can do everything all by myself except the things that count. I still wish I had help with the little things, and I'd much rather be capable of supporting myself.

Ugggh exhaustion sets in... I'm planning some substantive posts soon. Never fear.

"Hey sally.... hows it going? i hope good!  hehe... i
can’t wait untill we’re out of high school and in our
house together with robbie and whomever else might
live with us. And since i will be getting like $600 a
month for being in college i dont think payment will
be bad if we divide everything up equally.... and i do
truly believe you robbie and i will still all be best
friends cuz we are not like veryone else.. we’re gonna
last forever!!!!!!  i think college will be awesome if
you go to stetson too!! ahck! im just so excited about
the future right now... even though i dont know what i
want to be, but i’m thinking about either journalist
type stuff or interior decorator.
    well i just want you to know i love you sooo much,
you have been the best friend i could ever ask for,
sure we bicker about dumb stuff, but honestly, we just
have so much fun with each other and love for each
other... youre awesome in every way i just pray to god
that nothing will ever seperate us!


                                Love always,
                                .........                            "

Guess who? Ahhh... don't you love lifelong friendships? Oh, wait a minute... that friendship lasted a year and ended in bitter hatred.



I did myself a huge favor and gave my e-mail a colon cleaning. Yay! I got to reminisce in all the stupid things guys have "said" to me (via email) over the past two years.

21 in two weeks. Will I feel like an adult then?

I have a research paper I'm working on. It's mostly about the cost of Organic food and really anything non processed. Stumbled on this and I was so happy to have found it.
   
Oh. And I joined Etsy.

Sallis Le Feu handmade beaded jewelry (and holiday stuff coming soon)
Yay handmade!

I don't care who gets elected. I don't care what they say, do, or vote for.
Obama is not going to save the liberals from the big bad republicans. McCain is not going to give our sissy sniveling nation a backbone.
People are not going to write more to their local governments, or join interest groups. People are not going to protest productively, or become more hands-on in their communities. People are going to check the headlines, and read what they get forwarded. Students will research when assigned a topic, and try to sift through constantly conflicting "facts" and statistics.
Someone's going to tell someone else what to think. We will convince ourselves that "it just adds up" or makes sense or that the "sources are reliable" because those are the soundbytes we're taught to trust.

It doesn't matter who I vote for, because I am apathetic and ignorant. Hopefully, this acknowledgment of failure in character will motivate me to do some real good. To speak softly and beat bad guys with a big stick. yay, violence.